Introduction
1.1 Background to the Study
In our experiences, others seem so close; yet in our thinking, they remain remote…
-William Ralph Shroeder1
The experience of others becomes an issue of concern and interest for basically two reasons- cultural and intellectual. From the cultural perspective (which is of primary concern in this work), we are confronted with some facts. Personal relationships are troubled: divorces are increasing; families are breaking apart; cultural groups clash over conflicting interests and friendships exit under great strains. We oscillate between a desperate effort to commit ourselves completely and an insistence on remaining islands unto ourselves. Even for those who try hardest and care, most interpersonal relationships seem only to touch the surface; at best, they leave one unharmed; more often, they deliberate and disorient.2
Although interpersonal life promises a full-course meal, for many, it provides only a series of appetizers.
A related fact is the lowered expectations people have for relationships as a result of which Careers take precedence; relationships are sacrificed. Injunctions to be individual, authentic and concerned only about oneself are hawked from street corners by self-help proselytizers. One becomes convinced that one must continually oppose others if one is to remain oneself. One trusts very few; from the rest, one hopes for indifference rather than resistance. As our hopes diminish, our efforts to create radiant relationships are abandoned, and a cycle of entropy ensues.3
Intellectual issues are the second motivation, the question of which lie at the foundation of social sciences and ethics. One’s conception of the nature of others determines what can be observed and known about them and what procedures of inquiry can be most productive.
One’s position on the nature of interpersonal relations determines what social entities should be investigated. In addition, the importance people give to ethics and politics depends on the adequacy with which they grasp the reality of others and the clarity with which they understand their relationship with others. If one does not or cannot experience the presence and personhood of others, then ethical and political thought becomes merely academic. Therefore, if ethics is to discover realizable ideals and to seriously address the contemporary interpersonal situations, an incisive phenomenology of interpersonal experience will be indispensible….
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